O Lord, I am astonished at the difference between my receivings and deservings, between the state I am now in and my past gracelessness, between the heaven I am bound for and hell I merit.
Who made me to differ, but thee? For I was no more ready to receive Christ than were others; I could not have begun to love thee hadst thou not first loved me, or been willing unless thou hadst first made me so.
Excerpt from The Valley of Vision,
ed. by Arthur Bennett, p. 18