If Jesus had consulted an Attorney...

A Modern Lord's Prayer

Our Father, who shall be termed party of

the first part, whose place of business

is in Heaven, Hallowed be thy name. 

Thy Kingdom, pursuant to terms and

conditions, come.  

 

Thy will, duly uncontested, be done on

earth, inasfar as existing statutes

permit, as it is in Heaven.     

Give us this third day of

December, 2011, our daily bread.   

 

Forgive us our debts, notwithstanding

claims, liens and legal costs, as we,

who shall be termed party of the second

part, forgive our debtors.     

And lead us not into temptation, i.e.

sin, corruption, greed, gluttony, etc.,

but deliver us from evil, the nature of

which shall be determined by the court. 

   

For thine is the Kingdom, and the Power,

and, pending appeal, the Glory forever. 

Amen.